[CDsDontBurn]

gosh, i hate myself. most of you guys would think this is pimp, but i don't. recently i cheated on my gf that i've been with for a year and half. i am not the kind of guy who goes out and cheats on people cuz i am not the kind of guy who does this kind of stuff. up until now, i have never cheated on my gf (now my ex i guess) and i'm all sad about it cuz we were always talking about getting married, having kids, and pretty much just having a life together.

cuz of what i did, i broke up w/my gf, and now i hate myself for doing so. i hurt inside all the time, and keep my mask on when i'm everywhere else.

I'm confused and don't have any clue as to what to do. i still love her, but i don't want to hurt her again. So now i'm seeing this other girl, but i'm still talking to my ex. the other girl really likes me alot, and my ex still loves me. i like both of them for completely different reasons, but i don't know what to do.

to make one happy, i have to hurt the other, which i think is not cool. has anybody come across this before that has any good advice as to what to do?

i just don't know what to do anymore

[Judas]

i'd suggest taking awhile off... learn about yourself... make sure you can trust yourself before walking into anothers life..... or you may end up hurting more then you'd ever would have wanted....

[CDsDontBurn]

that's what i told my ex.....i don't want to get back w/her cuz i don't want to hurt her. she loves me so much tho that she wants to give it another shot, even though i don't want to cuz i could do it again. i don't want to hurt her again.

[Geminiwave]

Originally Posted by Judas

i'd suggest taking awhile off... learn about yourself... make sure you can trust yourself before walking into anothers life..... or you may end up hurting more then you'd ever would have wanted....

I'd say that Judas said it better than I could. Learn about yourself. It goes very far.

After my girlfriend of 10 months dumped me, I was miserable. I was a complete mess. And to top it all off...I got hit by a car the next day. It wasnt a good shock to have after being dumped.

Then the next day I found out that she dumped me because she wanted to go have a ...*ahem* fun night with some guys she met in florida. but didnt because she didnt want to cheat on me. Anyway it was very bad. So 2 weeks later this girl is all over me and I was like "What the hell!" and went out with her. had some wild times, and then it broke off. She was in love with me...I wasnt. Anyway I took a long time off...got to know myself...and now I met someone whom is REALLY REALLY awesome. I cant tell you how great she is.

anyway the point is. You really should take some time off and figure out what your needs are.

[TJ-]

just be honest... i had a similar problem... just tak to both of them and let them know the situation they should understand

[GutterPunk]

If you 'Truely loved' her, there should be no desire to cheat on her or hurt her again

take that into consideration

and i agree take a lil time off

[pr0digal jenius]

If loves you enough to be willign to give you another chance, I'd take that as a good sign that you have found the right person, personally.

Talk to her about it, and come to some agreement/get on the same page. BE COMPLETELY HONEST. Take some time off to have to yourself, and see which you like better...life with her, or without her. Then, make your final decision.

Basically, I'm saying that if she still loves you, then you have somethign really special and shouldn't let a shot at yer self image/pride ruin that.

Best of luck with it tho....feel free to IM/Email me if ya wanna talk....I know it's hard.

[Judas]

i still suggest you really take the time... the orginal you had cheated on may want to be still together..... but if you don't give her time to think about it all.... she is most likely to fill with hatred and she will NOT forget what you had done... and she'll use it....

[Zardon]

Originally Posted by CDsDontBurn

i just don't know what to do anymore

I could give you a long winded post saying you should talk to your long standing girlfriend, treat her with respect and apologise, but I wont.

Why? because ive found in life most women do what they want, so really at the end of the day, you should also do what YOU want. Its the only way to enjoy life. Im not saying walk over people or use them, but go with your gut instinct and dont base your decisions on what you think you should do or what people tell you to do, it never works. Its your call. Always remember something, look after yourself (and your family), women come and go.

[pr0digal jenius]

Originally Posted by Zardon

I could give you a long winded post saying you should talk to your long standing girlfriend, treat her with respect and apologise, but I wont.

Why? because ive found in life most women do what they want, so really at the end of the day, you should also do what YOU want. Its the only way to enjoy life. Im not saying walk over people or use them, but go with your gut instinct and dont base your decisions on what you think you should do or what people tell you to do, it never works. Its your call.

Very true....

You have to find someone willign to accept you for who you are, rather then accepting you for the front you put on to feel accepted. Life's to short to live it as someone else.

[YAYitsAndrew]

I was in the exact same situation when I was in high school. I was dating a girl for 2 years and cheated on her with a flavor-of-the-weekend. She wasn't really an interesting person but she put out easy. Before I offer you advice let me tell you that (three years later) I'm in no way associated with either girl at this point in my life, and I don't forsee any future associations. I used to talk with that girlfriend about marriage and kids and stuff. If this was your first serious relationship then I'd say it's pretty normal to talk about that stuff; normal enough that it may not have any actual meaning.

I like what gutterpunk said. The fact that you didn't stop yourself means you should rethink how you really care about your girlfriend. With my current girlfriend I get really guilty when I think about other women. It may have been that I learned my lesson.

I say move on. I got back together with my girlfriend after I cheated and it wasn't the same. Despite our desires to want another person to be with, we weren't that person for each other. Date someone because you want to be with that certain someone, not because you want to be with just someone.

You're a couple months older than me so I'll assume you are in college. It's a big temptation. Some people are ready to settle into a relationship during college but most just want to stick it in as many holes as they can find. Figure out which one of those people you are.

[Sandok]

I think you should really STOP for a sec and listen to yourself... What are you doing? Why are you doing? And how can you solve it... Take a breather and REFLECT on what you did... I totally hate when people cheat and I understand the "fun" of having to gals at once but it's just wrong... I find u made the right descision to leave ur ex but if she wants a second change, maybe u've found TRUE love and not some cheap thing?

[Callandor]

I don't have a GF. I never have before and my lil bro says that when it comes to gals, I'm real immature, so don't take my not posting any advice here to offence bud.

But so far, sounds to me that the general motion of "talk to her and listen to what she says back" & "find out who you are" are real good ideas indeed. If I were you, that's what I'd do dude.

[Vikingod]

I wouldn't get down on yourself too bad. I don't blame you for feeling bad, you should, but you are what, 20 or 21. You are still young, and are allowed to do stuff like that. Were you married? no. Do you have kids? no (I don't think). Than you have only one person to answer for, and that is yourself. Once you have all that other stuff, then you should begin to worry of your responsibility to others. Untill then, don't hate yourself for making a mistake, a mistake that others with the formentioned responsibilities do everyday and not bat an eye, and not even consider it a mistake. Take it from me, enjoy having only the responsibility to yourself, cause when it goes away, it's gone forever. I'm not saying live your life chasing tail, personally that was never a big issue for me, and i get the feeling it isn't for you. Just take into heart that you are young and don't have responsibility. It's not anything worth hating yourself over.

[riles9262]

Just take some time off and think. Personally, if you are able (mentally) to cheat on someone you love, you should not be in a relationship. Don't beat yourself up or get depressed about the whole thing, use it as a learning experience about yourself. You will be a better person in the end, and your next relationship will be a stronger one.

[Sandok]

Or you will like cheating sooo much u can never have a relationship again... Be careful man!

[Senor_Mota]

most of you guys would think this is pimp

Anyone who thinks it's "Pimp" to cheat on their significant other has a very pathetic sense of self-worth.

Here's the thing, dude. Let bygones be bygones. You may have made a mistake that you regret, but if she is the right person then she will be willing to forgive you and accept you for who you are. I cheated on my girlfriend after we had been dating for a year. I got drunk, saw an old friend, and we ended up kissing(we missed each other, to say the least). My girlfriend had always hated her because we were so close, but friends are friends. When we crossed the line though, I was aware I'd done something wrong - so I went and told my girlfriend the morning after. She cried and cried and I tried to reason with her that it was just a kiss. She got mad and I didn't talk to her for a couple of days. I didn't think I'd ever hear from her again, but she called and apologized for her behavior and gave me her forgiveness. To this day, we've built such a strong relationship around honesty that we can tell each other anything, no matter who it will hurt or how much it will hurt.

The Four Rules for Dating Women by Senor_Mota.

• Always be yourself, don't put up a front.
• You should never change yourself for a woman. Compromise is best.
• Never ever give her a reason to not trust you.
• Don't have sex with them until the fourth of fifth date...if they want it before, they're a slut. If they don't want it at all, then you've found the right one!

Take a break, relax, and go get head from some whore until you find a decent girl. They say laughter is the best medicine...and we all know how funny blow jobs are.

Good Luck!

[CDsDontBurn]

around everybody, i am myself. i do not act differently, i do not talk differently. i am who i am. the only thing i do, is just put away my sadness behind me until nobody is around to see me. Imna do what alot of you guys are saying, and just do things for myself for a little while and see where that gets me. If i'm unhappy and don't like the way things are going, imna go back w/my girl.

[Senor_Mota]

*Pats the ol' Pac-Man on the back

Hey, you'll do alright...women love a man on the rebound.

[CDsDontBurn]

.

[nuG]

*sigh* ...... i just had a relationship end a few months ago .......i dated her for a year and a half and we were best friends for a couple years before we started dating......... this girl meant the world to me. But i was having some probelms and she went through everything with me. At first i thought i wanted to break up with her, but when we eventually broke up, i found out that she was the love of my life. But apparently she is a little drunken slut. She had sex with this guy a few weeks after we broke up, then slept with me again NOT TELLING ME that she had slept with someone else. She said she didnt but then later on she said she did. Then she ended up sleeping with this other kid just becuase she was drunk and someon walked in on them. anyway, i couldnt date her now, she changed way too much for my likings. of course im not innocent either, i slept with someone else too but i talk to the girl and am sorta seeing her, but we just havent said anything , just sorta seeing where it goes. you dont watn to rush things, just let them slide into place. but i feel you man, i am still completely heart broken ove rmy ex, i still lvoe her to death even though i will never date her again even if she wanted to get back to together. thats a choice i had to accept. shes a little slut. and now shes seeing this other kid who shes probably slept with and she didnt tell him that she slept with a kid on his baseball team that lives in his dorm because once again, shes a slut. She totally f**ked me up. and im stil not over it.

[CDsDontBurn]

damn nuG. that's pretty rough. we all have our own hardships though, and we all take them differently.

[nuG]

yeah you can say that again

[CDsDontBurn]

damn nuG. that's pretty rough. we all have our own hardships though, and we all take them differently.

[nuG]

lol