Why are men happier?

Falstaff · Oct 8, 2007, 02:01 PM

Men Are Just Happier People

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, they can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..

You can do Christmas shopping for all your relatives on December 24 in 30 minutes.

No wonder men are happier

**ChaosMinionX** · Oct 8, 2007, 02:12 PM

Haha, so true.

Necrosis · Oct 8, 2007, 02:16 PM

Forgot the "genetically passed down knowledge of all things electronic".

Falstaff · Oct 8, 2007, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Necrosis

Forgot the "genetically passed down knowledge of all things electronic".

or mechanical, or logical...the list is long and distinguished..

written by a woman anyway...

I wonder if this is how Gemini feels about us?

Mousey · Oct 8, 2007, 03:16 PM

lol i like this, it's true XD
It's also quicker to pee lol

GutterPunk · Oct 8, 2007, 03:19 PM

nice one!

**ChaosMinionX** · Oct 8, 2007, 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Falstaff

I wonder if this is how Gemini feels about us?

Ermmm.... I must be terribly off base on who Gemini is

Judas · Oct 9, 2007, 01:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Falstaff

Men Are Just Happier People

What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.

(er, not always....)

The garage is all yours.

(Sometimes... becoming more rare.... another question is that more and more men don't have a clue about even cars anymore)

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

(This has recently come under some fire)

Chocolate is just another snack.

(TRUE)

You can be President.

(or primeminister.... course.. anyone can.... even the insane)

You can never be pregnant.

(TRUE...)

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

(YES and YES.... ....but..... you'd be surprised what you may see.... Some shouldn't

)

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

(FALSE... this is so utterly completely false)

The world is your urinal.

(never seen a women park thier ass against a tree or on the bump of a car?)

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

(Lines have been crossed here!)

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

(I'll admit, things are decieving..... and more things have been found with reversed threads...)

Wrinkles add character.

(

)

Wedding dress $5000.

(

that.... )

Tux rental-$100.

(

that again, higher class casual is my kind of clothing...)

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

(that's true, but the non-hetro..... well they apparently stare at different things...)

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

(expected? It's demanded, even from women.... gotta love a woman that can deal it out just as good...)

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

(enless you demand nike...... )

One mood all the time.

(mostly true yes...)

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

(YES...... enless some jackass links over or puts you on hold....)

You know stuff about tanks.

(TOPS!...... woot!)

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

(Or less....... sometimes nothing at all)

You can open all your own jars.

(Lies...)

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

(False credit....)

If someone forgets to invite you, they can still be your friend.

(Just less of a friend....)

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

(Less if you buy 2nd hand)

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

(who the

needs 3 pairs for? 1 pair is usually MORE then enough)

You almost never have strap problems in public.

(Apparently suspenders aren't in again yet... course some peoples belts dig in....)

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

(100% true)

Everything on your face stays its original color.

(Excluding the morning date with the mirror after a late night party... occasionally)

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

(I don't know.... some men seem to roll with the fads.....)

You only have to shave your face and neck.

(Depends on what else bothers you... or........ *cough*)

You can play with toys all your life.

(And women can't.... *cough*)

Your belly usually hides your big hips.

(What hips?)

One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.

(TRUE)

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

(TRUE)

You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

("do" is a very strong word...)

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..

(True)

You can do Christmas shopping for all your relatives on December 24 in 30 minutes.

("can do" but not without a lashback of some sort)

No wonder men are happier

comments in brackets

PangingJr · Oct 9, 2007, 02:20 AM

lol i will mostly agree that most of those are true. but then again there are different types of men out there, some are just less than a man.
whoever wrote that could be just another man who is actually less than a man.
if woman wrote that that is just based on what she knew, she just had no idea that there are a lot of different types of men out there.