parents fighting, my dad hates me

CDsDontBurn

my parents have been fighting alot recently, and i think my dad hates me.

my dad got me a truck two years ago scope it out here back when he was cool. now i think he hates me cuz he thinks i'm a lazy bum even though i work two jobs, go to school, and have a girlfriend. my parents are most likely going to get divorced after like 23yrs. of marriage, i'm now 20yrs. old, and don't know what to do. i don't make enough to get my own place, and i don't want to move in w/my dad afterwards, and my mom might move to the east coast w/her brother (i live on west coast). my gf is helping out as best she can, and i appreciate her for that. i love her so much.

right now my dad is drunk, and still drinking w/his best buddy talking about taking away my truck. i'm in my room right now trying not to make contact with either of them. I will leave my house as soon as possible, but i still don't know where to spend the night. it'll prolly be in front of my gf's house in my truck. i don't want to wake anybody over there. i gotta be at work at 9am; it's 4:30am right now.

all i can do is sit in my room for now and hope my dad doesn't come in right now. i don't know if i am shivering from fear of my dad, or from the cold morning air coming from the outside. probably both.

Asmoday

Damn that sucks!!!..

But if i where you, i wouldn't post that in here....risking getting flamed about it. Better move it to OT or something, maybe you'll get some advice....

Zardon

Thats a terrible situation man, ive moved this to off topic so people can talk with you and maybe offer some support or advice.

good luck and let us know what happens.

dj_stick

i hope you get things sorted mate, and you definately aint lazy

Nacht

what are your jobs? maybe you could find a roomate to lighten the burden of an apartment or something

CDsDontBurn

I work at UPS, and PC Club. i don't know anybody to roomate with.

thanks Zardon for moving my thread. Didn't know if i had posted in the right place.

i'm at work now though (PC Club), place is tight to work at.

BiGBrOwNPimpsta

my dad passed away 5 yrs ago

he was an alchoholic too ya know, but now your 20 gotta keep it goin man, you gota job school and girl maintain it. i hope everything gets better

PoopyTheJ

My prayers are with you bro. I'm a recovering Alcoholic, been sober 9 yrs now and I can see myself as your dad as quickly as I can see myself sober. Where do you live? If you don't have a firend who you can move in with to share rent and whatnot perhaps a site like this would help, http://apartments.metroroommates.com/ . I hope things get better and soon.

zerodamage

Think about the Military buddy. Place to live, school, job.guaranteed paycheck, full medical benefits.

Sourcer_2002

I dont get a long with my parents well ... they feel i spend to much time on the PC...they dont understand this IS my future lol

BlackBirdSR

Hey Pac-Man!

my father passed away just 4 months ago. As hard as it may be, he left this life as a loving father and husband.
It must be much harder to feel that your father might hate you. That he's fighting with your mother, and threatening to destroy what you have worked so hard to build... your life.

I wish I had some advice that could resolve everything in a matter of moments, but I got none of this kind
Make sure your girlfriends knows hoch much you appreciate her help. You don't have to buy expensive things or show her Paris. The small things often show how much you really love her.

As for your father; if there is no way to show him how you feel, I can only wish you luck that everything resolves quickly, and without much grief and sorrow.

I might not have had that much luck lately. But if I see it pass by my doors, I'll send it over to you!
Take care, may god bless you.

GutterPunk

aight bro... your 20 yrs old you should have control over your decisions and life. I am not knocking you bro, but dude, your dad takin away your truck at 20...

To be honest with you, I am in the same situation... My parents today threatened to pull the plug on helping me out on my education, my car, and just random things, because i want to be with my girl. They don't uderstand... I have a job, going to get another one when i get back from mexico. Financialy I am confident I could move out myself and be able to afford an apartment and food. There is always help like food stamps and assisted living. I would look into these heavily, because it seems that your parents are holding back potential. Your 20 man get a place ask your girl to move in with you maybe? Have some fun bro. I wish you best of luck, it's hard for me to help you cuz im in the same situation cept i dont live w/ my parents. peace man

CDsDontBurn

i pay my insurance, my dad pays my truck; however, we are both on the policy. I'm thinking w/this new job i haveat pc club, i will be able to pay my truck myself and maybe afford my own place.

and everybody else, thank you for your advice.

MythicaL

Wow... that must suck...

Mazuko

My parents got divorced while I was a freshman in highschool. My mom and I left and we had nothing except the clothes on our backs, and my dog.

I was going to school full time, and working 2 jobs while we lived with a friend. The thing is, I never knew how poorly off we were financially, my mom never mentioned it, never once asked me for a penny, and never once asked for help. She just kept trucking along letting me keep my money to pay for my ride and insurance.

At 18 I went off to college on the opposite side of the state. I learned to live on my own, got a job, thanked God uncle sam was helping me pay for college with loans via financial aid, and I've managed to do all right on my own for the last 5 years. It's all in how you deal with things bud, as far as supporting yourself. Just cut out the little things like a candy bar, beer, telephone service, cable tv, washing your vehicle every week. It's amazing how much money you can save if you actually consciously monitor what you spend your money on.

As far as the situation with your father, my dad and I don't get along at all. I have no respect for the man at all and he is my anti-roll model. But that doesn't mean he hates me, as a son, or I him as a father. Sure he's not a good father but he is the only dad I will ever have, ya know? People say alot of stupid things when they are drinking, god knows I have, maybe it was a slip of the tongue? Who knows? Maybe your parents are not in good shape financially and can no longer afford to pay for your truck insurance, and perhaps your dad thinks you can't pay for it either because he thinks you do not save money very well?

Before you jump off the deep end and move out, the best thing you can do is to actually sit down and TALK to your parents. Don't get them both in the same room, just talk to one of them at a time, or just one of them for that matter. There is no better advice anyone can give you than to simply say to talk to them.

I hope things work out for you bud, it's not easy, but you can get through this

Falstaff

I feel for ya man, your gonna have to grow up emotionally much faster than your friends, it is gonna be hard. My children have never forgotten my first divorce and have not forgiven their pyschopathic mother either, but somehow we all get along I guess. Anger and frustration can sure feel some sentiments or feelings that are not sincere but just as destructive as true fear and anger.

tek

Sorry to hear about that shit man..... I go through that crap almost daily with my dad, it never used to be shitty like this but last month he just changed, almost into a different person... he's just constantly pissed off now and he always finds something to yell at me about... even when I'm doing the right thing.

He too is an alcoholic, and so was his father before him....

I just leave the house as much as possible man... get together with some friends, get drunk.... smoke a bowl or two.
I know its not the best way to get away from it, but its the only way I can... I'm 16 years old in less than a month... obviously no driver liscense.

I hope shit gets better for you man, seems like a worser situation for you than me.

post back

Mazuko

Going down the same path of alchoholism as your father is not the way to solve anything.

Be the better man, not the same one.

tek

I know this.... and I wont, I am not an alcoholic in any way.... I drink maybe once every 2-3 weeks.

The pot is a different story though

Dont take my advice..... if I was located close to you I'd help you out bro.
Theres a lot of helpful people on the forums man, Mazuko is one of them

Judas

Question..... Is the truck registered/liecenced under your name or your fathers?

fireball

Hope all turns out well Pac-Man

pezton

I have found out for myself that the best solution is to move out and start things on your own. I feel much better now compared to when i lived with my parents. How you are going to do that is another question. I just want to remind you that things can get better.

CDsDontBurn

My mom will sit down and listen to both sides of the story. My dad is the kind of person who says "my way or the highway."

I don't smoke, drink, nor do drugs. some of my friends who do and invite me think i am boring. I will however have a shot of rum or tequila once in a blue moon; no beer tho, i don't like beer.

the truck is under both our names. i am thinking of refinancing my truck w/o my dad on the license

i really do want go it alone. move out of my parents broken wing.

From everybody elses posts, it seems to me that some of you guys have had it harder than i do.